New Music from Jay-Z

Some say, "Ain't I" is from a mixtape entitled, "I am Legend" while some, speculate that its off of Jay- Z's Blueprint 3. DJ Clue states, "off that Blueprint 3," throughout the song so who knows? Only time will tell if Jay is going to put out a Blueprint 3. Check the audio. Me Likes.

Start making Valentine's Day Plans

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Electric Relaxation

The New Year has just started yet your stressing out already. There are numerous reasons that reducing stress is critical for your health and wellness. When you’re stressed out your more prone to illness, and high stress over a long period of time can spur ailments such as heart disease, high blood pressure, migraines, insomnia and ulcers. When you’re stressed, you’re irritable, snappy and agitated. Try these five tips to calm your cute butt down and improve your overall outlook on life.

1. Just breathe and stop: When you’re stressed, we usually forget to breathe because we’re straining ourselves. First take a few deep breaths. Next, give this pranayama technique a try: 1) Inhale deeply. 2) Hold your breath for 4 seconds. 3) Exhale for count of 4 seconds. 4) Repeat. Continue this pattern for about one minute.

2. Shake it Off: Sometimes stress is so habitual that we have to literally shake it off. Try standing up with extended arms and imagine yourself as a soggy wet dog and shake the stress off. Also try going for a short walk and take the scenery.

3. When you’re smiling: Give yourself a happy break. Just like whistling a happy tune, smile to fake a happy mood. Smiling sends a message to your unconscious mind and automatically generates a positive mood and attitude. If you fake happiness long enough, you might just start to believe that it’s true. If that isn’t working, pick up the paper for today’s comic strip or watch a 5-minute funny video on YouTube.

4. Tight like That: Lie flat on the floor. Starting with the feet: tighten and squeeze your feet as much as you can. Then move upward, tense and relax the ankles, calves, knees, thighs and entire body one by one. When you get to your head, lift the head off the ground and squeeze all the muscles of your face. Lie quietly for a minute afterward, noticing the change in your body and basking in the calm.

5. When you’re dreaming: Close your eyes. Take a deep breath. Imagine a bright red rose in front of you. Notice the vibrant petals, its color and its texture. See this rose clearly in your minds eye. Take another deep breath and smell the rose. Savor its scent and let it fill your body. Slowly open your eyes. Keep your eyes soft for just a minute longer, lingering on the beautiful rose.

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When the New Year comes, you enter January with a list of things you need to change which can be depressing. Why not use what you've got and upgrade them this year? Try these 10 examples to make you feel happier:

1. Since it's winter, buy a year-round flowering plant for your crib so you'll feel lively and springy even if it's freezing outside.

2. Monday morning, upgrade your coffee to a latte.

3. When Wednesday rolls around, celebrate the fact that you've made it midweek, by treating yourself to dessert at lunch. Go ahead and order that cupcake!

4. Rule of thumb: Never go on a date without wearing your sassy panties and matching bra, even if he won't see them, you'll feel sexy and confident.

5. Make a energizing and inspiring play list for your commute to work, then make a calm, relaxing one for your commute back home.

6. After a long day at work, there is nothing like a nice glass of wine. Splurge on a couple snazzy, high end glasses, like Riendel. They are designed to optimize the aroma and flavor of your wine, which can make all the difference.

7. Turn your bathroom into a spa. Fill your bathroom with scented candles in relaxing scents like lavender.

8. Looking forward to your big plans on Friday night? Plan ahead and take the day off. That way you can spend all day primping and relaxing so you'll have a more enjoyable girls night out.

9. Love sleeping in? Make your bed even more comfortable by upgrading the thread count of your sheets. They must be at least 250 count and higher, the higher the number the softer the sheets.

10. Buy cute, flattering gym clothes, you'll actually look forward to sweating.

Need more relaxation? Click the video, A Tribe Called Quest: Electric Relaxation

Letter to my Girlfriends:You Should Let Him Love You

Listening to females complain about their cheating boyfriends, I often wonder if they are truly unhappy if they would leave the two-timer or stay with him just for the sake of having a boyfriend? The girls who complain are gorgeous, educated, funny and stylish, and if their boyfriends don’t see all their wonderful qualities, then he doesn’t deserve my fellow fly girls.

To my ladies who stay with the boyfriend who cheats, I ask this simple question: Why don’t you see all the qualities in yourself that I see? Why don’t you see that there are probably tons of guys constantly checking your facebook page to see if you’ve change your status from, “in a relationship” to “single” that if you were to leave your dude alone, you probably wouldn’t be alone for long.

Or what about the female who dates guys, who have a two-baby mama minimal, works at fast food restaurants, has no car and lives at home. While she has zero baby daddy’s, is a budding career woman and is independent- do you know what that means? That means that she has her own apartment, her own car and works a job that doesn’t include the introduction, “May I take your order please?” Yet, her choices in men are less than stellar.

Or the homegirl who has been dealing with the same guy for years and while she’s hoping he will be her real life, Mr. Big. Her dealings with him look more Sex and the City, season one than season six. Why are we lowering our standards just to get a date? And if the pickings are indeed slim should we be prepared to be lonely forever?

It’s one thing to maybe lower your standards when the time is ticking on your biological clock by while we’re still young and vibrant with plenty to choose from, why choose less when you can have more?

It’s not just the decision to out on a date with the fast food guy and if the fellow fly girl really enjoyed his company and truly liked him and his children than more power to her, but it’s when she allows herself to be objectified and caught in the all the drama with the baby mamas and babysitting kids that aren’t hers just so she won’t have to go to the movies alone, that’s lowering standards.

Allowing yourself to accept that he doesn’t call you back, he doesn’t bring you flowers, pokes girls on facebook daily, meets jump-offs on myspace, shows that you don’t love yourself. When you allow yourself to break up with him and get back together for years, it maybe shows evidence of low self-esteem. Hoping that he will change and become your true life, Mr. Big is just that, a hope.

I have the utmost respect for my ladies, we are strong and self-determining, yet I wish all females could see the fly girl that lives within them. My girlfriends have always told me that my standards are too high, but I don’t see it that way, I see my standards in men as a reflection of what I want in life and I deserve all that I work hard for. With so many daily struggles, the last thing I want to struggle with is my love life. I want to come home to a man who calls me back with the sense of urgency, who surprises me with my favorite flowers, a man that makes date plans and comes thru with the dinner reservations.

Dear fellow fly girls, right now, we are in our prime, we start our dating habits in our 20s and if we’re constantly having the conversations about how men aren’t sh*t than maybe it’s not them -its you. Stop allowing yourself to settle when you deserve the world. I believe that there are good men out there and you will have to kiss plenty of frogs to get to your prince but once your knight in shining armor arrives, you’ll realize how the frogs are best left in the wild.

Listen to Mario’s “Let Me Love You”

Go Green with Style

Are you Black but think Green? ( Thanks Kari!)

You can save the enviorment one lipstick at a time! Cargo Cosmetics has came up with a brillant idea. Try Cargo Cosmetics' Plant Love Lipstick, each lipstick tube is a compostable tube made of corn. Plant the box that your favorite Cargo shade comes in and it'll grow a patch of wildflowers.

Botanical Lipstick What it is: A lipstick tube made entirely out of corn - a renewable and abundant resource. This environmentally-friendly innovation also emits less greenhouse gases, which many scientists believe to be the major cause of global warming. The outer carton is made of flower paper embedded with real flower seeds. Simply moisten, plant, and wait for a bouquet of wild flowers to grow!

What it is formulated to do: Smooth and silky, the innovative botanical formula is infused with Orchid Complex™ and meadowfoam seed oil as well as jojoba and shea butter. Not only that, but it's environmentally friendly, containing no mineral oils or petroleums.

What else you need to know: Cargo is donating two dollars from the sale of every shade to St. Jude Children's Research Hospital. The PlantLove seeds we sow today affect future generations so we are investing in the earth and our children for the future of the planet!

Bonus: Six of these gorgeous lipsticks were designed by your favorite celebrities:

-Evangeline Lily -: Lindsay Lohan

- Maria Menounos -: Mariska Hargitay

-Sarah-: Sarah Chalke

-Cece-: Courteney Cox

Saving the environment has never looked flyer!

Game Night

Just came home from a long day of work or school and looking for a way to unwind? Try your hand in Lush's Play Your Cards Right Massage Bar ( $9 lush.com). Lush's Play Your Cards Right Massage Bar is a solid bar that your poker partner can massage onto you as the bar softens as it warms. It might feel a little awkward rubbing a slab of lotion on but the scent of Jasmine makes up for it. This is one card you should include in your deck- just make sure your partner plays the right hand. No reneging allowed.

Try other bath and body products from Lush at lush.com

Sealed with a Kiss

Was your New Years resolution to lose weight? Try losing your holiday pounds the fly and glam way. You know there’s gross tasting nail polish to stop you from biting your nails now to keep you from overeating, there’s gloop that smells like Starbursts.

FUZE (the beverage company) and Too Faced cosmetics has collaborated and resulted in FUZE Slenderize Guilt Free Gloss ($18. 50, Sephora). The lip-gloss comes in three “flavors”- Dragonfruit Lime, Strawberry Melon and Blueberry. They are very fragrant but licking your lips provides no satisfaction. FUZE Slenderize Guilt Free Gloss are infused with energizing ingredients and Super Ceriman, which is supposed to suppress the appetite.

So go ahead, make sure your lip-gloss is poppin', try Fuze Slenderize Guilt Free Gloss and watch the pounds melt away.

Let's Get It On: Marvin Restaurant in DC

After reading mixed reviews about this new establishment, Marvin on 14th and U in Washington, DC, I decided to head out with my girlfriends and see what all the fuss was about. Mind you, I didn't go on the weekend so the atmosphere may vary but tonight I had a blast and will definitely return.

Paying homage to DC native Marvin Gaye, Marvin has a hip interior with posters of Marvin Gaye adoring the walls along with other soul singers. A two level bar/ restaurant/ lounge, Marvin's at first glance seems to be the newest trendy spot for hipsters alike. The first level is the dining room with a small bar, Marvin’s calls itself a restaurant with a bar not a bar with a restaurant.

Heading up stairs, there is the intimate lounge area and rooftop patio. Still scouting the place, I headed outside to the patio and although it was outdoors, heaters are placed everywhere so it's warm and perfect to sit outside, have one of Marvin's Belgian beers and enjoy the DC skyline.

Entering the lounge area, sits another bar and seating. The lounge area is perfect for couples that will enjoy the close private seating without the crowd of the dining room. The lounge is self-served, so when your ready to order head to the bartender and sample Marvin's Belgian inspired entrees.

The bartender schooled my homegirl and myself on the menu entrees, stating that Marvin Gaye left DC to escape his woes and traveled to Belgian for two years to relax and regain his focus on his music. The owner of Marvin's actually saw Marvin in Belgian and decided to build his menu with the Belgian inspirations.

On your plate: Sample the appetizers. Try the duck and shrimp and grits. Entrees range from $ 16 to $ 24. For dessert, check out the Belgian chocolate waffle topped with chocolate gelato paired with hot chocolate.

In your cup: Marvin’s has a full bar so order your favorite drink but you can’t leave without trying one of their beers, Stella Artois, Leffe Brune, Hoegaarden and the Canadian-made (but Belgian-style) Maudite are among the beers on tap. Thirty Belgian beers are available in bottles. For the wine lovers, Marvin’s has a boarder selection of wines than other spot, so try a glass! Beers start at $8.

Music Selection: They can’t name the place Marvin, if they didn’t play any of his music. The DJ booth is located up stairs and you can groove to R&B, soul and funk from the 60’s, 70’s.

WEDNESDAY::BALTIMORE The Wire/FADER Auction Event

If you're in the Baltimore area and are a fan of HBO'S The Wire then Fader Magazine presents a Silent Auction for your only chance to grab autgraphed Wire merchandise!

Event: Wednesday, Jan. 23, 8PM
Baltimore Museum of Industry
1415 Key Highway, Baltimore

Includes: Free Drinks and Hors D'oeuveres! Live Performances by The BackYard Band and DJ Rod Lee

Click here to RSVP: http://www.thefader.com/newsletters/wirebmore/invite.html

Winter Blues

Winter Beauty Misery- Beauty Solutions:

Winter’s snow might be pretty but there is no other season that is worst on your skin and hair. Try these beauty tricks, and you won’t be singing the blues anymore!

Cracked, Peeling Lips?
During the winter months, your lips become dry and start to chap. And on a dry mouth, bacteria pushes their way in, causing more chapping.

Beauty Solution: Spread on CO Bigelow’s Soothing Lip Formula to buff away the chapped lips. This gentle lip exfoliator is the perfect remedy for flaky, peeling, chapped lips. Made with mango butter,shea butter, and cocoa butter. $ 7. 50 bigelowchemists.com

After you’ve buffed away the chapped lips, follow up with Kiehl’s Lip Balm # 1 in Cranberry. Packed with the antioxidant, Cranberry, it boosts softness. $ 8.50 kiehls.com

Try this at home recipe for recipe for chap lips (Do this twice a week to get kissable lips):

What you will need:

1 tsp. Sugar

1 Green Tea bag

1 tsp. Olive oil

1/2 Cup cold water

3 disposable cups/bowls

First, put the sugar into a small bowl or cup, the olive oil into another, and pour 1/2 cup of cold water into the remaining cup. Dip the tea bag in and out of the water a few times. It's definitely know a lot easier when it's hot, but it is important that the water be cold, to soothe and revive lips.

Next, add the tea water, drops at a time, into the sugar. Mix together until it becomes the consistency of wet sand. Using the tips of your fingers, apply the sugar and tea mixture to your lips . Gently rub in a circular motion. Don't rub too hard. Do this for 10-20 seconds.

Rinse your lips with water and pat dry. Squeeze out excess water from tea bag and use it to pat lips. Do this for 30 seconds. Let your lips air dry.Dab the oil onto your lips with your fingertip. Don't over do it. It should be as if you are putting on lip gloss. Leave on for 2 minutes. Wipe off excess oil with tea bag.

Chapped Hands and Brittle Nails?

The wintry combination of freezing winds and then the heat being indoors weaken your hands and nails. Try Mary Kay's Satin Hands Pampering Set.

The Satin Hands Satin Smoothie Hand Scrub cleanses and exfoliates. It's an everyday treat for hands to leave them feeling smooth and soft instantly. And you'll love the fresh peach scent. It's part of the Satin Hands Pampering Set for irresistibly smooth, super-soft hands in three easy steps. The Satin Hands Pampering Set includes Extra Emollient Night Cream, Satin Hands includes Satin Smoothie Hand Scrub with a convenient pump dispenser and Satin Hands Hand Cream to condition and moisturize for hours. All three come in a pretty peach-colored bag. $ 30 marykay

Raheem DeVaughn's Love Behind the Melody

Raheem DeVaughn has done it again, he has a made another classic musical masterpiece. The “Love Behind the Melody” is an irresistible soundtrack that will make even the most jaded person fall in love with the idea of being in love.

A 17- track CD, “Love Behind the Melody” explores the elation of being in love allowing each song to bring out the nostalgic feelings of love, the joy of a new love and the perils of falling in love. Raheem DeVaughn’s voice is soulful and reminiscence of fellow D.C. local, the late Marvin Gaye. His voice guides effortless over a Scott Storch beat on “Love Drug”, he pairs well with Big Boi from Outkast on “Energy” and his lead single, “Woman” is one of the best songs dedicated to females in decades.

Track after track, Raheem displays his love and affection for women, on “Marathon”, Raheem pairs with Floetry and it’s a match made in neo-soul heaven, track seven, “Mo’ Better” the R&B- hippie-neosoul- rockstar bares that being a woman who stands beside her man during the hard times not only makes him a better person but it makes being love even sweeter.

“Love Behind the Melody”, evokes emotion while listening to it, you’ll get giddy while singing along to “Butterflies”, you’ll wish that every man could have Raheem’s mindset on “She’s not You”, and if you ever had a love lost, you will definitely relate to “Empty”. The LP offers incredible production with lyrical content, beats that groove you and lyrics that move you.

In the era of teenyboppers, it is refreshing to have an adult voice that may possible be one of the best R&B albums of the year.

Check out Raheem’s myspace: www.myspace.com/devaughnenterprises

Watch Raheem DeVaughn's Video for Woman:

More Videos

Also, check out Malik Yusef- He is featured on the Love Behind The Melody. He has a fly interlude entitled, " Woman I Desire", where he spits a spoken word poem. He was hired to coach Larnez Tate in the movie, "Love Jones", he was featured on Kanye West's Late Registration and Carl Thomas' Emotional and Rebound albums and he was also featured on Russell Simmon's Def Comedy Jam.

Get Familiar here:

www.myspace.com/malikyusef

I am not my hair

To wear a weave or to not wear a weave? That is the question. This past weekend my best friend was playing hair stylist to my other best friend by putting a relaxer in her hair, with a fresh perm my friend decided to complete the hair styling herself and proceeded to put a fake bun in her hair. When she emerged from bathroom her hair was slicked down and in the back was an attached bun in the center of her head. How does it look she asked? I piped up and offered my opinion and simply asked her, “Why don’t you wear your hair?”

“I don’t like my hair,” she replied. Then we went into a discussion to why she doesn’t wear her own but opts to add attachments and sew-in weaves. In the years that I’ve known her, I have rarely seen her own natural hair that sits on the top of her head. What is there not to love about your own hair? In our conversation about our hair, I was the first to admit that I had my own hair insecurities. I too was a slave to weaves. It all started in high school when I decided to try a new look and add some hair to my own. The new look turned into a six yearlong relationship with Yaki human hair and glue. Every two weeks I would religiously go into the beauty supply store buy 12 inch Yaki straight and have my hair stylist gel down my own hair and attach the weave. When the two weeks was up, I then struggled to wash all the hair glue out and started the process over. Now, if anything my weaves were fly and I often received compliments on my hair. But underneath the weave, I had no idea what my own hair was doing and I completely neglected my natural hair by continuously adding glue on top of glue, and no matter how many compliments I received, sporting around fake hair by Europeans still didn’t do it for me.

I had to carry around hair glue in my purse in case a track slipped, I would never allow my boyfriend to touch my hair and when I started to sweat during gym class, I was relived that I had my hair glue in my hobo bag. I was also envious of other girls who could wear their own hair, I took notice to every girl who had a healthy feather wrap, beautiful bouncy curls, a hip natural ‘fro or two-toned locs. I yearned to have my boyfriend run his fingers through my hair not find a head full of tracks. So for my 21st birthday, I decided to break free of the weave chains and wash out the glue for the last time and cut my hair.

I felt like a brand new woman, I had a cute short Malinda Williams do and I finally had a hairstyle with my own hair! I would constantly run my own fingers through my hair, examine my hair in the mirror and I felt great! I was no longer a slave to weave, I finally understood that underneath the glue and tracks lived healthy hair that was all mines. Not only, did the new hair cut boost my self esteem, it showed up my facial features, brought out my eyes and smile and I no longer hid behind a long hair that wasn’t mines. Plus, guys loved my new look!

In my continued conversation with my best friends, I convince my friend to take out the bun and have my other friend flat iron her hair. 20 minutes later, my friend had a full, healthy feather wrap, when she observed herself in the mirror; she shocked herself. She never knew that her hair could look so good, she too felt like a new woman. It was simple; she just needed someone to push her into seeing how wonderful her natural self was. If one chooses to wear a weave there is nothing wrong with that decision, but when one opts to become a slave to weave you might have to look deeper into yourself. If you’re attempting to achieve a look that isn’t you, try to find your own personal style.If you’re going to weave, rock the hell outta of it! And if you wearing your own hair keep it healthy, remember it does lie on top of your head.

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How to keep your hair healthy:

Water
Drink lots of water. Water makes up one-fourth of the weight of a strand of hair. Moisture makes the hair supple, so make sure you get plenty of fluids. Do not wait till you are thirsty to drink water, being thirsty means your body has lost water and you are dehydrated. Drinking eight to ten glasses of water a day will help keep your hair silky and shiny.

Eat Protein
Protein is one the key to healthy hair. Protein will give the shaft if your hair more strength and helps reduce the likelihood of damage through brushing and splitting. Foods such as fish, meat, milk, cheese and cereals contain tons of protein.

Minerals


There are several minerals that help aid in having healthy hair:

• Iron helps to carry oxygen to the hair. Without enough iron, hair and its follicles get starved of oxygen. This means that the ‘goodness’ in the root of your hair is much less effective along the length of the strand. You can increase your iron intake by eating red meat and dark green vegetables, or by iron supplements.
  



• Zinc builds hair protein, which helps to prevent hair loss. Meat and seafood are the foods highest in zinc.
  


• Copper is involved in the pigmentation of hair. You can optimize your natural color with a diet with plenty of copper. Who needs hair dye and fake color! Shellfish, liver, fresh vegetables, nuts, seeds and meat are all high in copper
  
  
  Vitamins
  Get Familiar with these vitamins to maintain healthy hair:
  
  


• Vitamin A will give you a healthy scalp, because it’s great for the skin! You can get vitamin A from foods like vegetables - in particular, in carrots. (So it’s good for the waistline too!)




• Vitamin B and C are important for good circulation, hair growth and hair color. If you ensure that you have enough vitamin B and C, you’ll have strong, supple strands of hair that do not split. You can get these vitamins from eating foods like fruit, vegetables, cereals, eggs, milk and bread.

Adding Shine to Hair:

Fine Hair:
Look for a shampoo that has wheat proteins and polymers as ingredients. They coat the hair shaft, making it appear thicker. Learn to use spray volumizers. They light enough to deposit a light mist of shine in droplets on the hair without wilting it.

Normal Hair:
Use a shampoo that has silk amino acids. It adds softness and repair hair structure. Lecithin restores hair texture. Gels and creams will add shine without weight. First, it's necessary to pour the product in your palm. Rub your hands together, and then lightly pat over head.

Thick Coarse Hair:
The best shine enhancers for this type of hair are old-fashioned pomades. They work not only to deliver shine, but to moisturize this type of hair.


Tips For More Shine:

* Use heat-activated shampoo * Deep condition at least weekly * Don't use too many styling products that can dull the hair by coating it.

Try this homemade hair mask, it work wonders for your hair and you can snack on the fruit while adding shine to your hair!

Strawberry Hair Mask: Mash eight strawberries with one-tablespoon mayonnaise. Massage into washed, damp hair. Cover with a shower cap, then a warm towel. Wash out with a shampoo/conditioner combination. This luscious mix of rich acidic berries will leave your hair both conditioned and with rich gloss.

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Products to try:

Paul Mitchell’s Tea Tree Oil- Tea Tree Special Shampoo Fresh and Clean – A special combination of cleansers and Australian tea tree oil leave hair refreshingly clean, while enhancing vitality and adding lusterStimulates – The combination of tea tree oil and peppermint create a cooling tingleInvigorates – The unique combination of tea tree oil, peppermint, and lavender creates a refreshing fragrance experience $11.99 drugstore.com

Organics Conditioning Hair Oil This organic conditioning hair oil contains of sesame seed, sunflower and olive oil and few drops of this potent blend, is all it takes to revitalize and rejuvenate coarse hair. It also protects your strands from the harsh exposure of pollutants, smoke and the sun. $22.50 orgins.com

Keune Phyto Protein Spray Used by celebrities, this protein-rich spray, which can be rinsed out or left in, conditions locks while natural green tea and chamomile extracts help to calm. It also helps protect your hair and scalp before, during and after coloring and perming. $16.80 keune.com

Listen to this, " I'm Not My Hair" by India Arie featuring Akon